Just before takeoff

Days 1377, 1378, and 1379 - I have not been very good about blogging this trip. But it's been a wonderful one. I saw my son almost every day, I got to spend time with my friend and I got to visit several mystic stores. I learned some new things and got few ideas and now I am ready to get back home. It is not the kind of trip where I travel around so after a while I just want to get back home and to my life. I might have to shorten my visits in the future; two weeks is too long of a trip, especially if my son will leave the area. My daughter's schedule is not such that justifies a two weeks visit. I'll have to see how it unfolds. I'm on the plane, and about to leave. Farewell America and hello Israel. I'm so happy to be heading back home.

Day 1376 - an afternoon with my granddaughter

Sunday...

Day 1375 - my last days here and the last weekend. I got to sped the with my son again. This time I joined his day the way he likes his Sundays. Football at the local sport bar and later hanging out at his apartment. He explained the rules and the formations (sadly, I never followed the game before) and the truth is that when I understood that the game became interesting. So we hung out at the bar for several hours and I learned about football and about fantasy football and it gave me a little pick into part of his world I never before took the time to understand. So I was very happy about that. I think that a long visit gives me that rare opportunity to get to know my kids better. And it gives me some real quality time. I feel lucky that at the age of twenty eight my son still invites me to hang out with him. And I love the weekend for the free and in-hurried time it gives us.

Quality time

Days 1373 and 1374 - I'm not keeping up with my blog on this trip; somehow time is not so real and definit. For the first time since I arrived I went to the bay land yesterday for a hike. I even ran for 15 minutes, something I didn't do in a very long time. It was beautiful as always and very serene and I was very happy about the running part of it; maybe I'll be able to get back to running... Today I went back there with my son, just strolling but still enjoying the walk and even more so the talk. I spend the last two days with my son and it was wonderful. He is at a point of making big decision and I am very happy to be of help while he's contemplating his future moves. I also just enjoy his company and our long talks after a year apart. It makes me happy to see him getting more comfortable in his own skin, to see him getting more mature and responsible. I treasure days like today so much. I sure don't take even one minute of it for granted.

Still jet lagged!!

Day 1371 and 1372 - I cannot get rid of the jet lag this time. Usually I just wake up the next morning on local time and that the end of the story, but on this trip it's a whole different story. By the late afternoon I get so tired that I can barely open my eyes. Yesterday it was during a drive back from San Francisco, really not the best timing. I had a dinner date with my friend and immediately after that I drove back to her home, where I'm staying during my visit, and decided to take a nap because I was so tired. I slept through the alarm I set and only woke up three hours later when my phone rang. And promptly went back to sleep until 4 am. Such a bad sleeping pattern will just keep the situation going. I'm not sure what's so different this time that the jet lag is such an experience but something is not as usual. In a week I a flying back home and I sure hope the scenario will not repeat itself there. Today I'm in SF again and I hope for a better ride back home. It was a real torture yesterday. I am taking the time to visit different mystic shops here in the area and hopefully get some new ideas for our store. And it is interesting to see the direction that each store takes. Each one has a very different flair and identity and it is very interesting to examine them with this in mind. Tomorrow I'll go back to one of the store I visited last year before we opened, I'm sure ill see things I didn't notice last time and have few more questions to the owner. It's nice to mix pleasure and work, especially where for me, this work is a real pleasure. So the stores close early here and by now I finished my scouting for today, the rest will be done tomorrow. Few more minutes to let the commute traffic subside and I'll hit the road on my way home. I am thankful for a pleasant and productive day in the city. I am thankful for a good night sleep, even if in installments, I sure learned to appreciate it this time around. I am thankful for the privilege to be a tourist in this beautiful city, I sure didn't do it enough while I lived less than an hour away for so many years, but I do it now and it's wonderful. I am thankful for my day.

Alone time

Day 1370 - both of my kids are away for the next few days. It's a little sad since I am here for such a short time but I can't expect them to take time off from their life just because I'm here, so we all do our best and this is why I come for two weeks - to have more of a chance to see them. I also learned last week that my daughter is planning a visit next month and my son plans to arrive in two months so all is good. I spend the day with my friend who hosts me at her home, so I'm very happy about that. I did some research as to where I want to travel in the next few days, there's plenty to learn for the store so I am looking forward to that. It's late and I am very tired by now. I have to wake up early tomorrow so this will be it for tonight. I am thankful for the time I got to spend with my kids. I am thankful for special time with my girl friend. I am thankful for Skype that as always cuts the distance and makes my time away more barable.

Day 1369 - another day here with my kids. It is very special exactly because of that. I got to spend few hours with my daughter and her family and then a few with my son. I feel so blessed I can do that. My granddaughter was diagnosed today with pneumonia and coming back here tonight I felt a little under the weather and by now I am shivering and I feel hot, I hope I'm not getting sick. Still, even i

The benefits of a short visit

Day 1367 and 1368 - I guess I am still jet legged since I forgot to post my sorry excuse for a blog on Thursday and totally forgot to write on Friday. Opsss... But I hope I am now back on my tracks. So Friday I got to see my daughter and my little granddaughter and it was so wonderful. I spent a long time with them and it was so great. I comes as no surprise that a little girl develops so much in a year. She was a toddler and now she is a little girl. Coming here after such a long time means I get to spend a lot of quality time with my loved ones, my kids, my granddaughter and my friends so in a way I think we get to spend more of a quality time than had I lived here and met them more often. It is the distance and the scarcity that brings the intensity, thus the quality into every day stuff.

Days 1365 and 1366 - enroute to the US without a computer so no way for me to blog. But I got today a local SIM card and now I can blog again. I saw my son yesterday night upon my arrival and it was wonderful. A year is too long of a time between meetings.

A day off

Day 1364 - yesterday I had an epiphany; even though we have a store we did not sign up for slavery. Or in daily language, we can and should take a vacation even if we are self-employed and every day that the store is closed we "loose" money. A day off in the middle if the week when things are open and we were tourists for a day. We have to remember that we cannot always delay things for later and never live the moment. It sure was something very special. Quality time, just the two of us, all over the Galilee, visiting little known places, some cultural adventures as well, and above all the joy of an unexpected vacation was just what we needed. We are sure to repeat this again. And for me, even after four years since I returned here I find so many places I knew nothing about. I am thankful for a great idea to take time for ourselves. I am thankful for a wonderful day with my beloved partner.

Getting ready

Day 1363 - In three days I am traveling back to the states to see my older kids and my granddaughter after a year away. So finally I decided to get out my suitcase and start packing. I always do that on the last day but I don't , want to miss things so I started early. As always

What should I do with my life

Day 1362 - I'm reading a book about existential psychology and it brings up the subject of death and our very basic and deep fear of it. The efforts we put into avoiding thinking about it, as well as the well known fact that only when we face our death we can fully live. An interesting subject indeed. The Buddhism deals with that and I read few books about that but I don't really ever ask myself these questions or think about them very much. And by avoiding the subject I lower my awareness to my life as I live them minute by minute and let the events and circumstances take control. At my age and life experience, it is time to take one more step in this direction. Define priorities and things I wish to accomplish and set timeline so at the end of my life I will not have too many regrets. I came here four years ago with so many plans and somehow I let life get in the way of "living" and all my dreams were put on hold. I will take the coming few weeks to actually think things over and see what I'll come up with. I am thankful for every reminder that life is so short and should not be put on back burner for later. I am thankful for the leading hand of the universe that put this book in my hand. I am thankful for an opportunity to grow up.

Day 1361 - a slow and restful weekend with my daughter, just before my flight to visit her siblings. Reading books, watching a movie, long talks, and of course cooking, eating and going out for coffee. I love those weekends she's here and we get to spend some time together. As our kids are getting into adulthood they have their own lives to manage and we become observers, and less involved. So every little bit of closeness is precious and cherished.

Looking ahead

Day 1360 - an interesting movie about a dysfunctional family followed by a heart to heart talk with my daughter. I think that the worst thing about such family is that the kids don't have a good role model to create a better family for themselves. And being a member of a family like that, my daughter is rightfully concerned about the future. I told her my belief, that she knows what to be attuned to, what are the kind of behaviors that should set the alarm. That she has a good chance at a better family exactly because of that. But I can understand her concerns. The last thing I wanted is for my kids to be hurt and yet I was not smart enough to prevent it. I can just hope my kids will be smarter and make better decisions than me. It is so sad and painful looking back and knowing I failed, and I let down my kids. And there is nothing I can do to change that; except listening to their pain if they choose to share it with me.

Segment three of the trail

Day 1359 - we hiked segment three of the Israel National Trail. It was a very hot day and I am exhausted. But it was much fun and we are 55 km into the trail. (55 out if 940 km, but still 55 km. my partner has serious back problem right now, but this is not a good enough reason for him to skip it. So it was not an easy task but a very fulfilling one. But as I said, I'm so very tired and at 9:00pm I'm already in bed.

Day 1358 - a good day in the store after a very slow week and tomorrow is a holiday, one of many in the month of Tishrei, so we are planning a short hiking trip, thus an early bedtime.

Graduation

Day 1357 - today was the last day of my numerology class. It is a very strange feeling. Something that was part of my routine for the past five month is ending. And I loved this class. The good news is that in three weeks I will start the advanced class so it's not really over, but still a milestone on my road to a new career as a numerologist. I am looking forward to the day I'll feel comfortable enough to call myself that. It was a very spontaneous decision and a wonderful one. A world I knew nothing about, open in front of me. Every week I am coming back after class all excited about the new things I learned. I look at my life and the choices I made very differently. And I am looking forward to do that for other people and help them at important junctions to make better choices, to have easier and more fulfilled life. It is an amazing feeling. And I know I am so lucky to have this tool in my life. I am thankful for the knowledge I gained in the past five months in this exciting field of numerology. I am thankful I can now call myself at least when no one head, a beginner numerologist. I am thankful to my partner for opening my eyes to this exciting field thus to a new career. I am thankful to the friends I gained in the past few months and especially to a great teacher that helped us take our very first steps in this field.

Day 1356 - posting late due to technical difficulties

I love the fall

Day 1355 - the nights are getting colder. We love eating our meals on our porch, and by now we have to put on a fleece jacket, especially at night. And to top it all I pulled out my beloved dawn comforter tonight, it's that chilly at night. So yes, the seasons are turning and yet another fall is here. I love this time a year with its chilly nights and bright blue days. The heaviness of the summer is over and the wetness of the winter is not here yet. Its the perfect time of the year. True, it's not as beautiful as in New England with the splendor of colors it presents, but for my simple needs the modest display of colors and the very welcoming relief from the humidity are all I am asking for. And the reminder of the passing of time is the most important part of all. Use what you still have wisely, the clock keeps ticking and your days on this earth are getting shorter. "Don't fall asleep on your watch, man". I am thankful for this welcomed guest among us, the fall. I am thankful for all the gifts he brings with him. I am thankful for yet another reminder to live my life well, life of no regrets.

Day of atonement

Day 1354 - Tom kippur here, day of atonement. A day of fasting and reflection. A very quiet day. Almost no one is driving, only emergency vehicles, no TV, no radio or music if any kind. You hear no one, no cars, no neighbors, not even little kids. So a perfect day for relaxing and sleeping. A very slow and quiet day. Originally we planned to go hiking for the two days of the holiday but due to health issue we had to change our plans. So we stayed home, took long naps and talked. And it was wonderful. I hope next year we will be able to go hiking, but I have to admit it was a very needed time off. And now I feel recharged and ready to save the world. I am thankful for a very lovely weekend. I am thankful for food and rest. I am thankful by the end of the weekend my partner feels better.

Relationships, commitment and love

Day 1353 - my partner has some health problems right now and he feels very bad that it has an influence on my life. It sounds silly but I see where he is coming from. In our first marriage we take it for granted that we have this responsibility towards each other. Especially since it looks so far out and we see so many years of good health ahead of us that it's almost an academic discussion. But in a later relationship we are older, each one brings into the mix history as well as health issue and since no children are involved, the ties are weaker and nothing is taken for granted. It is not a given that a partner of few years will want to stay by our side if things are getting bad, especially if there is no real prospect of getting healthy again. I never thought of that before but when he expressed how bad he feels about the burden his health issued are putting on me I suddenly had this very depressing thought. I sure don't see it this way but I know many do and it's sad. It's also sad that most if our healthy years are behind us and its only a matter if time before things will pop-up. But I made a choice to leave my comfortable life at the age of 52 so I will have to deal with all those questions. But coming to think about it, I prefer to do things because I choose and not because I am obligated. And I cherish so much more every day of good health and good fortune because I know my days are limited and who knows how many years we have to enjoy each other. I am thankful for every day we have together, healthy or not so. I am thankful for every day I still have on this planet of ours.

An old hobby of mine

Day 1352 - I had a meeting today with my CPA to go over my tax return. It's almost a year since I opened the store and from a very modest beginning it grew to a nice place. Still not where I hope to see it but by now it is in a good enough place that it can go on like that for a long time, especially since we see an increase in sales from month to month. It makes me very happy since I don't want to give it up. I love my store and the qualities it brings into my life. I love the spiritual development I did this year. And I M looking forward to the day I can start doing numerology consultation. I love the direction my life is going and so I needed this external reinforcement that it's looking ok and I can continue doing that. I never thought I will own a mystic store, but now that I do, I am so thankful for that. I feel so lucky to work in a field that intrigued and inspired me for years; that I used to spend days in stores like that and now I can spend weeks and months there. I am so thankful I had the insight to turn my hobby into a business.

Day 1351 - an evening on the beach this time a year already requires a top layer to keep us warm. But when we did that we were rewarded big times. The fresh sea air, the moon's reflection on the water, the soft humming of the waves rolling towards the beach... So much pleasure one can drive from the simplest things of all.