A new year 2014

Day 1076 - the last day of 2013 ends in grief. We always talk about death around this time a year as a symbol. The end of the old and the beginning of a new. But this year it is very literal. I am looking at the man I love as he deals with the situation and I am so happy I can be of some help; that my presence in his life right now makes his loss a little easier to bare. This brings everything back into perspective and the understanding that our life is so short and precious we waste no time on needless fights or torturing each other. That every moment we don't show our loved ones how deeply we care about them is a lost moment. That nothing matters but love. Happy New Year to you all; may it be filled with happiness and love.

I am thankful for the year that ends with all it's blessings and trials. I am thankful for the year to come.

The death of a parent

Day 1075 - my boyfriend's mom passed away today. He spent the morning in the hospital with her while i kept the store open and told me that it seems like its the end. He came back and just as I was getting ready to leave he was called back and this was it. The death of a parent is a very difficult one, its an end of an era, the end of so many things, good and bad that stayed open for years. It's the end of the year so obviously we talk a lot about death as a symbol of letting go of our past ghosts and making room for the new year, for new beginnings. How symbolic it is that she died a day before the end of the year. It is sad, even if she was lid and sick and is better off now that she doesn't suffer any more. In our culture where death is almost a taboo it is a very difficult event.
 
I am thankful I was able to conscience my partner to go this morning to the hospital even if I had to miss work. I am thankful I was there when he needed me. I am thankful I still experience this ever as a second hand, but I know it's only time before I'll be called too.

The right perspective

Day 1074 - a day that comes to an end. It seems that the people who wanted to rent the house backed off. It seems that the website designers are determined to do it their way instead of mine and its a constant fight for changes. It seems that this thig brings more fights at home then I care to admit. It seems that our store is still a big unknown and the winter for sure does not help. A day that comes to an end and I sure am glad about that. But I have to always remember that I still breath and so I have a chance for a better tomorrow. I can go to sleep in a warm bed in a cold night as tonight and my house doesn't even leak so I can stay dry as well. So many reasons to brbthankful. This is the purpose of this blog to remind myself even when the going gets rough that I have so much good in my life; that I have so many reasons to be thankful.
 
I am thankful for all the goodness in my life. I am thankful for days lie today since they make all other days look so much better. I am thankful for this blog; it keeps me grounded and puts everything in perspective.

A very special birhday

Day 1073 - I drove with my daughter today to my aunt and uncle's 80th birthday. It was a very special event with all the family branches, some people I didn't see in many years. It was so nice to see the three generations, to hear the stories and to bask in the warmth and love all around. When we meet people we know one side of who they are but every person is so complicate and has so many facets and an event like today introduced to me a facet of them I knew existed but nothing more. I saw them as grandparents, all their grandchildren telling stories about them and it was so much fun. Few precious hours carved out of our hurried daily life to pay tribute to wonderful people who happened to be so close and so dear to me. My aunt is very sick and we were all worried she wont make it to this day and I am so happy she did. I hope she still has many years in her.
 
I am thankful for a wonderful birthday party. I am thankful to be part of this wonderful family. I am thankful for all the love and warmth we experienced today. I am thankful I live here and get to enjoy this kinds of event, to reconnect with my family after so many years.

getting old

Day 1072 - a long discussion about prolonging the life of a very sick person in the wake of my partner's visit to his very sick and very old mom. I believe in one's right to decide if he wants to continue suffering or put an end to it and he doesn't. But coming back from the hospital he is starting to rethinking this notion. It is heart breaking to witeness the sufferings, the inability to do anything on her own. It is so heart breaking to see the people that once were so strong and now are so weak and so frail.

A delay

Day 1071 - it was too much to prepare for the mall tomorrow so we decided to get back to the original plan and start it as if next week. It is better to have everything ready than to get there and be unprepared.  We will get the credit card machine only next week, on Monday I hope and then I will have what I need. It is a little disappointing since I was so looking forward to do that, but even without the last minute rush to get ready I only arrived home at 10:30 pm. This week we will prepare the boxes with products as well as packaging material, take the credit card machine and just go. So a little delay, but I have so many thugs I want to do that are being delayed that its probably a good things I'm in the store tomorrow and have that extra time. 

I am thankful for all the progress we made today, for the beautiful products we bought. I am thankful for a very long yet productive. I am thankful I can go to sleep now, I'm falling asleep as I write. 

Networking

Day 1070 - On Wednesday we are now going o our weekly networking so even though it's only 11 pm I a so very tired. After two weeks of so-so reception today we started to feel that the group is warming up to us. people came and talked to us, asked questions and started to seek collaboration, we are making strides for sure. We had a visit from one member of the group today and came up with several ideas how we can create more traction and more business for us and for her. I am very optimistic about this collaboration. And to add to that one of our group came to me and offered to introduce us to another such group, an evening group this time, which we of course welcomed. Only yesterday we talked about needing to find an evening group as well, and here it was, only few hours later we got an offer to join such group. It's really interesting to see how our steps are being watched by the planet to make sure of our success; it really feels this way. 

I am thankful for all the business we had today in the store, all of them with special meanings to let us know someone watches over us. I am thankful to our networking group for their welcome and for their will to help. I am thankful for everything, absolutely everything in my life.  

Almost ready for Friday

Day 1069 - Shopping for Friday - a wheel cart, few plastic boxes and most importantly products. Now all I have to do is pack my boxes and I am ready. I hope by next weekend my business cards will be ready as well as the roll up, but I am not going to wait for them and I will start this week. the truth is I can't wait to do that. I see it a very direct and effective marketing for a very low price. True, the exposure is not very high but it is very targeted so I hope it will be very effective. On my part I am doing all I can to make it a success. It is way past midnight and I have to wake up in 5 hours to go for a networking group. So a short entry, as so many times before.
 
I am thankful for some very interesting articles we added to our collection today. I am thankful for being almost ready for the mall outing on Friday. I am thankful for some heated discussions about our future plans for the store. I am thankful for a very productive day.

Stepping up our efforts

Day 1068 - Part of our plan for getting our name out is to open a stand in one of the malls on Friday, the main shopping day and the best place during the winter. It was scheduled to start next week but yesterday I brought up this issue that there is no reason to back off until next year. That I can start a week earlier, that means this coming Friday. So I am not sure yet if its possible but I sure will try to make it real. So tomorrow we are going on a shopping trip to load enough inventory that we will be able to hold both places open and stocked. As usual, it's exciting and we have to make sure we won't bite too much, that we won't chew more than we can take. That it will be exciting and not a chore. But we both think its a very targeted advertising to the right crowd and we can also make some sales in the mean time. So I am going to sleep now tomorrow is a big day.
 
I am thankful for few great ideas we had today that will serve us well from now on. I am thankful that  the scarcity of costumes at the moment is not something to discourage us but serves as a boost to step up our efforts and be more creative. I am thankful I have a partner that is a real partner in this long and challenging road ahead.

The Challenge

Day 1067 - working on the website until the wee hours, setting targets, making plans... it is so challenging and exciting starting a new business. We made a business plan this weekend with certain goals every month and if we want to make it we have to start right away. And so we did. There are certain steps to be taken every single day and today was no exception. So we bought a staplers' gun and colored paper to create our flyers and deliver them all over town in the next two weeks. we made some phone calls for things we need and in the next few days business cards, car stickers and roll up will be added to the arsenal. It makes me live and thinking in full speed and I like it. What other steps we can take, what rocks we can turn, how to do things in a way that will be the most cost effective and the fastest. I never did things like that before and I love it!
 
I am thankful for all the interest the store project brings into my life. I am thankful for the creativity it brings out of me. I am thankful for the challenge - this is what brings all the best in me to the surface.

Wings of Hope

Day 1066 - Another couple came to see the house today and really liked it so I gave them my landlord's phone number. an hour later he called me to let me know that he is still negotiating with the couple from last week and it seems that in a day or two they will sign the contract and if not today's couple will get it and both couples want it from late January. The way it looks right now in a little over a month I am out of this house and homeless. As soon as they sign the contract I have to start looking for a place in the city again. I am really not looking forward to packing but I am so happy to leave this place and start over. It was a mistake and the price we all paid for it was not easy but I hope one day we will be able to look back and find the things we gained because of it. Sadly, I am not there yet. But at least I am going back to the city and life will be so much easier now with the store and all. about 2 hours less every day for commute, about 1500 ILS less on gas' lower rent... I can't wait for this to start.
 
I am thankful for the phone call and the promise of ending the situation in which I am stuck right now. I am thankful for the wings of hope flattering outside my window. I am thankful for a restful and very productive weekend and ready for a new week.

Elevator pitch

Day 1065 - I had time at the store this morning to read a little about promoting our business and one of the things they strongly talked about is sharpening my elevator pitch. This goes well with the fact we joined a networking group that meets once a week and we have to use that pitch there as well since we have one minute to present our business. So I read several articles and saw few YouTube videos and I think I got some ideas. Now I have until next Wednesday to shape it up and bring it to a place I can present it. I know this is really important, beside other ideas of course, but it is crucial to be able to present our case in a way that people will want to hear more.  and be intrigued to visit.
 
I am thankful I had time this morning to read and get some interesting ideas. I am thankful to all the people who put so much free stuff on the internet as a service to others. I am thankful for every little step I am taking in the right direction. I am thankful it is Friday, a short day and a rest day tomorrow.

Fight or flight

Day 1064 - It was the 75 anniversary gala evening to my hospital. A reception, lots of talks and a very good performance by one of the best singers in our country. So I bought tickets for that of course. But, alas, I did not take into account that my boyfriend will through a fit and decide an hour before the event to boycott it. I didn't think this is a good enough reason for me to skip it too, so I called a friend and asked her if she cares to join me, and she was happy to. So we both went and had a wonderful evening and only half an hour ago I got back home. A very short night but I had so much fun. And I am so happy I went. Besides not giving in to this kind if behavior I also really don't go out anymore so it was a very special occasion. My friend just broke up with her boyfriend so it was good for her as well, and I am happy I could help in cheering her up. A girls night, putting all this complicated issue of dating aside and just have fun. It was good for both if us on so many levels. And we enjoyed a great performance - all the better.

I am thankful for a great evening. I am thankful to my friend for doing this very last minute thing. I am thankful to my boyfriend for opening my eyes to yet one more thing in life. I am thankful I can go to sleep now before waking up in five hours to drive back to the store. Good night.

A good day at the store

Day 1063 - they hung the sign over our store yesterday and we already start to see the outcome of that. People see it and come in. So the flow is still slow and to be profitable we have to sell at least twice as much every day but that really doable. The most difficult part is to penetrate the market to let people know about us. So every one that comes in is a potentially repeat client, an advertiser for our little store. And the second day of a sign with no other advertising is a very good achievement. My friends are asking me for things, in our networking group people are starting to know us and see how we can cooperate, how they can help. If we'll play our cards right I think we can make something big here. And what can better than working on your hobby? What can be better than doing something you love as a job?!
 
I am thankful every day for this store and for what it brings into my life. I am thankful we had a very good day today. I am thankful I can go to sleep now, it's been a very long day.

Getting old

Day 1062-My mother in law fell and injured herself badly few weeks ago.  I went with my daughter to visit her today in the rehab center. It was a very difficult visit. For an active and alert lady she was few months ago she became an old lady. Sitting in a wheelchair with no energy at all. It broke my heart to see her. My daughter felt she has only a short time still left here, I think she has much more but the quality of life she had just recently is gone. I sure hope she will rebound, but I am not sure about that. I met her when she was younger than I am today and it was so difficult to see her today. We have to enjoy every day, every moment we live, we never know when it will be interrupted or cut short. Now, today is all we have, we better make a good use of it.
 
I am thankful I got to see my daughter before she flies on a business trip tomorrow. I am thankful we went to see gram. I am thankful for all the good times we shared with her and I hope she still has some. I am thankful for my day, pain, tears and all; if it will be my last then I am thankful for what I had.

Slow but steady progress

Day 1061 - I worked until 1 am yesterday to prepare for the call today with our website designer. And it all went as planned and he has now enough work for the coming week. Meanwhile we are making progress on our part - logging all the products in our store as well as taking pictures of them all. It's a slow process but every step is important and if we don't want to regret things later we better move in a slow but through pace. So that's what we do and we follow our timeline even a little ahead of time on that one and hopefully the sign that will be erected above our store tomorrow will make a difference and people will notice us more. I am very optimistic about the whole endeavor and every person who steps in is one more who will spread the word and bring us to the attention of his friends. It's winter, so it gives us time to get ready slowly and by spring I am sure we will be working full speed. But this is still way in the future. Today I am taking small steps towards that goal.
 
I am thankful for a very productive meeting today. I am thankful for progress we make in our store. I am thankful every day when I get there for the light and happiness it brings into my life. I am thankful I can live my dream.

Day 1060 - I just wrote my entry and it was erased by a system error. I'll do it again tomorrow since its 1 am right now. Good night

At home

Day 1059 - snow, rains, floods... But I am tucked safely at home, under the covers with no intention to pick out. I've seen enough storms to skip this one. How wonderful, restful.

Winter storm

Day 1058 - a severe winter storm all over the country with very heavy rains, floods and even snow in unexpected places. Even here, at sea level it's freezing cold. The AC is working at full blast for hours already but I am wearing a sweater and covered in fleece blanket to keep myself warm. A real winter storm; a rare occasion in a very hot country like ours. So I can either complain, as expected, or own the moment and enjoy this very special thing. And all this water is good for the crops, for the national water reserves, and for my garden that I tried in vain to grow and might see it happening now. And I am at home, dry and cosy under my little blanket, well fed and ready to go to sleep soon so,really, so many reasons to be thankful.
 
I am thankful for the here and now, for my present moment, for shelter, and warmth, for dryness and windless place. For. The food on my table ( actually, by now it's in my stomach). For these blessed rains, for all that I am thankful tonight.

Slow progress

Day 1057- I was a little sick today so I was able to put few hours of work for the website. It's very slow and time consuming. I didn't think it will take me that long. At this rate it will take more than a month before we'll be ready, probably much longer than a month.I am not very happy about that but this is as much as I can do. I have a day job and so I can work on that only on the weekend and at night. This is the problem with the decision I made, it takes a big toll on my free time and a big toll on the progress of our business. Patience is the name of the game and something I have to adapt. But at least today I made some progress and I hope tomorrow I'll feel better and be able to do more work. I have to admit, it was nice being sick in a cold and rainy day like today.
 
I am thankful for an unplanned day off. I am thankful for every bit of progress we make. I am thankful for a warm and dry bed in a day like that.
 

Networking circle

Day 1056 - a very stormy day. Torrential rains since the early morning but we made a commitment to go to a networking event in the morning and rain or shine you just do that. And it proved to be a good decision. We have to let people know about our store, and no one will do the work for us. So we took one more step in that direction. I hope some business will come out of this meeting and for sure we'll keep coming to the weekly meetings of the group. Only persisstance will open the gates of success for us. And I sure plan to succeed here with our little magical store. So some rain will not be a factor on my way there.
I am thankful to my friend for inviting us to the networking event. I am thankful to all the people in that circle. I am thankful that a day that started at 6 am is finally over and I can go to sleep now.
 

Phoneless day

Day 1055 - I forgot my cell phone at home yesterday. It happened to me few months ago and I survived it but now it's a very different story. I talk on the phone much more than ever before because of the store. And the worst is that I don't have the phone numbers written down since all is in my phone's memory. I have to admit I almost panicked but tried to keep a level head since I was not about to drive back almost an hour in each direction just to get my phone. I searched on the Internet for a few numbers I needed and everything else had to wait. And of course I could not get any calls as well. But all well if it ends well and I am happy to report I survived it and nothing really happened. The world still spins on its axis and the moon and sun rose and set in the right moment. Aparantly it is a little less needed device than we care to admit. And the panick is more in our heads than real. Maybe I should make it a habit to go once a week phone less and get few moments of quality time where I can be, just be, like in the old days... Still I was very happy to get back home and connect to my phone again and today I was chatting away, lie always. A short respit, a very short one.
 
I am thankful I got one day of rest to my poor ears and brain. I am thankful I survived the experience in a good shape. I am not so thankful to realize how addicted I am to that device, but thankful for this realization and the chance it gives me to change things a bit.

Our sign

Day 1054 - we finally did it; we made our decision about the sign. We went this morning to look at yet another sign manufector and we liked what we found. Very professional and right to the point he made us feel we are in good hands. And so after two or three weeks of searching we decided this is our guy and we signed the contract. Now the countdown is on. Hopefully in two weeks we will have a beautiful sign proudly showing our name over the store.
 
I am thankful we finally found our sign guy. I am thankful the wait is over. I am thankful for yet one more day.

Because of Broken glasses

Day 1053 - the little nose piece on my reading glasses broke yesterday so I went to the store to fix it. I asked them when was my last eye exam and realized it was almost three years ago. Since my eye sight gets blurry after I read I figured my prescription might be off by now. And so it was. But I also found out I need regular glasses as well. My far sight got bad as well. I found it hard to drive at night lately and I hope this will solve that issue, I hope it will fix the weakness of my eyes. It's funny, I don't feel I'm getting older but little signs like this one are a reminder of the clock ticking away our life; of the long line of burnt days behind and the one getting short ahead. So strange to think of it this way, all because a broken nose piece...

 I am thankful for a new pair of glasses I will soon get that I hope will fix my sore eyes. I am thankful I live in a place where this is an easy think to fix. I am thankful I have the means to do that. I am thankful for all the days behind me and for every day still ahead. I am thankful for my life.

Rainy Saturday

Day 1052 - it was a cold and rainy day. The perfect day to stay home eat hot soup and enjoy the fact it is Saturday and we don't have to go out. A perfect timing for a much needed rest. The truth is that I think of the store all the time and I either plan or do things that have to do with the store, but still it is in a much more relaxed way. Waking up late, eating normal food and staying in my PJ's all day long. And through this all I still managed to get a lot done and we are a step closer to our website. 

I am thankful for this much needed rest. I am thankful I don't work on Saturday so I had time to do what I need for the store. I am thankful for the good food, and most of all for the company. I am thankful for this rainy Saturday.   

Friday evening at home

Day 1051 - We came home today at 5 pm and had time to make a delicious dinner. It doesn't sound like much but during the week we have no time to prepare real food and we are too tired to eat anyway. But tonight was different. candles and a good meal - what a treat!! I am so happy with the store and so busy with it that these  little things are enough to make my life just wonderful. It is almost 1 am now and I was working until now on things I have to prepare for the new website we are building but it's not work for me but fun. I can only wish myself to always feel like that. I feel blessed for all the bliss in my life.
 
I am thankful for a wonderful day at the store. I am thankful for my friends who came to visit there and congratulate us. I am thankful for the privilege to work on my hobby every day. I am thankful for little steps in the right direction. I am thankful for all the blessings in my life.

New rains

Day 1050 - the rains are finally here. It started yesterday and was raining hard at night. When I drove to work today I had to slow down because of the heavy rain. And now it's beautiful. The air is crisp, fresh and clean and saturated with the fragrance of wet soil and fresh vegetation. I love this feeling of new life growing I love the freshness that rains bring with them and most of all I love the reminder of this endless cycle of birth and growth and death. I love the reminder that nothing is permanent and we  should not let life discourages us, there's alway a new tomorrow.

I am thankful for the blessing if a new rain. I am thankful for the revival every year anew. I am thankful another year is about to depart and another is on its way.

Decisions

Day 1049 - you have to make so many decisions as you start a new business. And it's not easy. Decisions about products and suppliers. Decisions about advertising and signage and website. Decisions, decisions, decisions... I am glad I can do that, I am glad I don't shy of decisions. But it sure takes a lot. Sometimes also heated arguments before it is done. But so far the end results are all good and satisfying. I sure hope it will stay this way. Today was no different as we are still struggling with the signage and cannot find yet what we are looking for. But I think it is better this way than to regret the final product later.
I am thankful I have a partner who stands his ground and makes me look again at things I rushed through or overlooked. I am thankful we both don't shy of decisions. I am thankful for every good one we made so far and for all those still awaiting us; it's what gives the color and taste to our daily life.

Day 1048 - we are done with curtains all over the store. I even took my sawing machine back home. We also finished covering the doors with a wood like cover and put new handles and the whole corner looks wonderful. There's still so much to do but two more items are off our list. The best thing of all was that by 9:30pm we were done, which means we made it home before 10:30pm. What a joy.

I am thankful for the progress we made today. I am thankful for

Renting my house

Day 1047 - someone came this morning to look at the house and he said he might be interested. Another one is coming tomorrow. So of course I am not celebrating before it is actually rented but I am very happy people are interested and they don't think the price is too high or the place is not acceptable. In short I am very optimistic I will be able to get out of the contract earlier. When every day is such a heavy toll I am ready for this experiment to be over. I am ready to go back to the city, where I belong, as I found out.

I am thankful my landlord agreed I can break my contract. I am thankful to all those Internet applications where I could advertise the house and make it known it is for rent. I am thankful to those two people who already inquired about it and made me so optimistic about my chances to leave soon.

Day 1046 - a quiet day at work and at the store. We closed at a normal time but drove one more time to Ikea for another round of shopping. I think that in the past two months I visited the store more than all the years before combined. In general, it's very amusing to see two people who hate shopping doing it day after day without even complaining about that. It is so different standing on the other side of the shopping scale. Being the proceeded instead of the consumer. Encouraging the thing I so didn't