Some other issues

Day 1288 - and day 24 th of the war. For almost a months our cities are under missiles attack on an hourly basis and our soldiers uncovering more and more terror tunnels. Scary I have no other word to describe that which we luckily found before they had the opportunity to use. But today I also found time after work to visit a mandala artist that we want to display some of his work at our store. An interesting visit and we'll know in the next few days if it will happen. But for now I enjoyed a very interesting evening for sure.

Day 1287 - no good news. The war is still going on.

At last

Day 1286 - I finally went to see my dentist after almost two year. I am even ashamed to admit such a neglect. But instead of beating myself for not going I am happy I did. And even more happy that they said all is well and I took good care of them. So my teeth are clean and plaque free and I did something very important for myself.

Day 21 of the war

Day 1285 - and day 21 of the war. It was supposedly a cease fire day today except for the fact that dozens and rockets and shells were fired in which 5 people died and dozens injured a sirens were going off over most of the country. and let's not forget a terrorists infiltration into our country via one of the infamous tunnels. A cease fire indeed. And so the days are following one another and no end in sight to the aggression against our people and the problem is that as the war gets longer and the the fatalities numbers of the poor people of Gaza are climbing, the world is getting less patient and try to force us to stop the fight. Regardless of the satanic plans of the Hamas who are holding the Gaza people as human shield, very successfully I should say, just to stop the bloodshed. I agree with the pain over every life lost but I also know that this heartless enemy will use every tunnel we still didn't discover to try to attack our country and they don't stop shooting missiles at us. I would love to see Mr. Obama if missiles will hit New York or Washington D.C. what would he say then? will he go out to war like his predecessor or ask for a cease fire like he is demanding of us? same for any other country in the world. I would love to see what would they say if the same thing that happens here will happen on their soil!!!
I am thankful for every day we can still hold against the international pressure and keep going. It is time to put an end to this saga. And believe me I used to be a very left wing person in my political opinions, but I see the reality of life here and I know it is very different than what the big TV channels are feeding the world with.

The fruits of love

Day 1284 - this morning I picked up the first cucumber from our little garden. It's so fresh and tasty when you eat it about a minute after picking it up. And it's so exciting to eat the fruits of your garden, the fruits of our labor. So in the middle of all the chaos around us, I am thankful for this little island of tranquility thanks to the heroic job our soldiers are doing to protect us.

Day 1283 - a very relaxed Saturday

Day 19 of the war

Day 1282 - the war is still going on, more and more terror tunnels are being discovered and slowly taken out of service, so we are on target. But the price is high; the death toll is climbing and the injuries toll is of course much higher and both keep climbing with every passing day. But let's not forget that what they are doing there probably saves many more lives of civilians. The satanic plan behind these tunnels was to go into Israeli settlements and kill and kidnap civilians. So with all the pain about the injuries and fatalities right now they are not in vain. They are changing the course of history as the Hamas was planning it and maybe by putting these pictures in the face of the free world they will also bring change in the situation in Gaza so the humanitarian aid will actually go to help the people of Gaza and not to build a military against us. I hold my hands in prayers for the safety of our soldiers, for the success of their mission there and for a peaceful agreement that will end the war and assure our country that this will never happen again.

Standing together

Day 1281 - another day in the war. One of the nice things at times like that is that everyone wants to do something to help, to be part of and not a stand-by person. And so we see help pouring in many different ways. Be it attending the funerals of line soldiers, visiting injured lone soldiers in the hospital (both are so not like any other place in the world that there were several articles about that in the international press) and of course collecting donations in money and goods for the soldiers. Every city has several places to we're one can bring stuff for the soldiers and others set a food station not far from the war zone so soldiers can eat for free on their way to base as they travel in this area. Maybe it's not much but it makes me feel happy to see how at times like that all differences are forgotten and we stand shoulder to shoulder as a nation, proud of our soldiers and supporting them 100%. They are risking their lives to protect ours and we embrace them fully. I love thissense of solidarity, these  acts of standing together, I love that when really needing it our people will be there in droves.

Still at war

Day 1280 - 16 days of war. Did you ever experienced something like that? Most people in the world will answer no to that but in our war torn country the correct question is how many wars you endured  in your life. This is our sad reality. I moved back here only four years ago (yes, I was too engulfed in the war to even notice this important date, this special milestone) and it's already my second since then. The people who stayed here all those long years that I was away had gone through several more. Those who were kids when I left are now in the reserved forces, fighting for our people's right to go to sleep at night peacefully and wake up in the morning in their bed after an uninterrupted sleep. Not much to ask, really. In most places in the world it is taken for granted but there are places in our country that if you can go for an hour with no siren going off, it is considered a quite day; something they have to be thankful for. That to go out and see that your street and backyard are intact, that your dog does not suffer from anxiety ( did you even know its possible)...
I cannot stay away from the updates about the war, I am so concerned about the safety and well being of our troops, but I cannot even imagine what's going on in the mind of my dear friends that their two sons are both officers and in the war right now. It's so scary. I pray for the safety of these two brave young men and for their safe return.
I god please protect our forces and save our soldiers, and keep them away from harm's way.

In the shadows of missiles

Day 1279 - the war is still going on in full force but life is slowly moving back to functional, like having my numerology class again, despite the threat of missile attacks. It was nice to be immersed for two hours in something completely different. It was nice to forget all about bombs and missile, about sirens and above all the safety of our soldiers and just think about how many kids one should have and what kind of partner s/he needs. I find it more amazing with every lesson and I can't wait for the next one; to learn more, to understand more...  Life in our war torn country is something only a local person can grasp. Living in the shadow of war and trying to carry on like nothing is going around. Can you imagine being in a suburb of Manhatan and worry about missiles falling from the sky on your house. Or mane Paris or London. Now try to imagine going through this every night for more than two weeks. Would you be able to smile? Would you be able to work or study? This is our crazy reality and I am thankful we got few hours of rest so we had no interruption during class. Half an hour after we finished while I was driving back home I heard on the radio the sirens alert.

Not so lonely

Day 1278 - a lone soldier died in the war. His family lives in the US and he decided to emigrate to Israel and after graduating from high school he joined the army as a lone soldier. His family was concerned that because of the fact that they don't live here not many people will attend his funeral. Someone got this message and published the story on Facebook asking people to attend and honor the fallen soldier and his family. The funeral took place at 11 pm tonight and thousands of people came to the cemetery at this late hour to pay their respect and show solidarity with the family and the country at this difficult junction. The police estimates that over 20,000 attended the funeral. I don't think anything came ease the pain of the family but at least they know that they are not alone and the country appreciate and thank their son for his courageous decision. My daughter came here especially for the funeral and so I joined her. We stayed only for the opening part, leaving the family to day their last goodbyes in privacy. It was beyond anyone's wildest dream to see this show of respect and love. It is why I love living in this country. The love, support and respect the coming together when things really matter and above all else the feeling of connecting to something bigger that us, the feeling that are never really alone here. And this in some strange way is part of why we are here on the edge of a very active vulcano.

A very sad day

Day 1277 - today is a very sad day. 13 soldiers got killed in the fights. There are no words to describe how heavy hearted everyone is. It's a country were everyone feels connected and feels the pain of others, especially on a day like today. We all know it was unavoidable; that our growing troupes had to go in and try to stop the madness of the past few weeks of non stop shooting into our territory. But still a whole country holds it breath in pain and mourning. What a sad day.

It's heating up here too

Day 1276 - Coming back from work today in a mall we encountered some traffic delays. At the beginning we didn't know what's going on, being the media disconnected people that we are but soon we learned that they is a big demonstration in the city and basically all roads are blocked. A swift action on our part and a little traffic violation enabled us to make it to the store so we could unload our boxes and we decided to leave the car in the store's parking and walk home since all roads seemed quite blocked. As we neared our house we found a police blockade and they did not allow anyone to go downhill there since in a near by neighborhood there were big demonstration. But looking old enough to be trusted they allowed us to go into the closed area and go home. So we made it home and sitting outside we could see the helicopter circling above and hear the demonstration but it was all from afar. but there is a lot of tension in the air and we could feel it in the shopping center, hearing people talk, and of course in the big showdown tonight.
Again, I pray for peace to come to our war ridden and hatred ridden area and I pray for a safe return of our troops. Two soldiers were killed today and several others got injured and it is so terrible. we raise generation after generation into this impossible situation that looks like a light years away from a peaceful solution. I pray for world peace and more so for peace for our country and our country people; god knows how much we all deserve this.

For a safe return

Day 1275 - yesterday our army started a ground attack. It's a very scary situation because you know that some soldiers will die or get injured. I don't have a son there but our dearest friends do have two sons there right now. I cannot even imagine what's going on with them right now. I worry about these two young men and I worry about all the other soldiers as well. Tonight I just pray that this operation will be over in no time and that they'll succeed in getting rid of the missile launchers that are aiming at our civilians. I also pray for the safety of our soldiers and that they'll be back home safe śound as soon as possible and in particular I prey to the safety of the sons of our friends.

Hard days work

Day 1274 - I just came back an hour ago from a long day of work at a mall. Long hours but not much work. I have to learn to deal with disappointments as well. A humbling experience for sure. All I want to do is to take a shower and go to bed for a few hours. But still there's a lot to be thankful even on a down day. And the ups and down of the daily income is part of life for a small business owner. We are doing our best in these hard times. When rockets are landing people don't have time or desire to celebrate. And we feel it every day now. I can only wish it will be short and that we'll survive it in as little damage as possible.

Creativity

Day 1273 - I went yesterday to a beading supply shop, looking for somethings we need for our store. It was a beautiful store, well stocked and I spend there a long time. This morning as soon as I came to our little store I started working with the supplies I bought and started making jewelry, one after another. I didn't think much of it even though I worked for hours, until the late afternoon when I realized I made 10 bracelets and 2 necklaces. It wouldn't be such a big thing but for the fact that I don't think I ever produced so much in one day. I never had the creativity to do that, nor the patience. So it made me very happy to see that after two weeks in the store full time I am starting to get in touch with my creative side. I started last week by making many crystal mobiles and now with the jewelry. I find this very exciting. When I left home I had this vague plan to make my living from this hobby of mine and now, it is not "making a living" but after almost four years I didn't touch my tools, I use them almost every day and I find new and creative ways to do that.
 
I am thankful for this renewal of my creative energy. I am thankful for this "artist date" that gave my inner artist a way to express herself. I am thankful for all the extra benefits I gain from opening my store and actually being there full time.

Day 1272 -

Personal Independence

Day 1271 - the only day I have for house chores is Saturday. But this weekend my daughter came back from her trip so I drove to the airport to pick her up and we spent the rest of the day together. It was wonderful but the house was not clean. In the summer, with no rains the house gets dirty very fast and gets dustier even faster. So today I decided to take care of that. My partner was in the store and I cleaned everything and even went shopping before joining him at the store. I love the fact I can do that; that I no longer hold two jobs and I can go shopping whenever I want to. It's such a wonderful concept. I don't have to do it after work, I don't have to delay it all unroll the weekend I can just go today on a Monday morning. No questions asked. I am still getting use to this new reality in my life and I love it. It takes a huge burden off my shoulders.
 
I am thankful for little things I can do now without feeling guilty. I am thankful for the extra responsibility, yet the freedom I gained. I am thankful for a clean house, for a full fridge and for still being able to breeze. I am thankful, yet once again for the decision I made to go my own way and not to stay in my tight but secure shelter of a job.

A very depressing reality

Day 1270 - nothing changes and you can feel the tension. People are checking their phones constantly for updates about rockets launching and sirens. Over hundred rockets were fired today already. No other country would tolerate this kind of hostility. And we are here, day after day of this activity with no end in sight. I live in the north so we are not in a great danger but most of the country is under attack, my daughter included. It's a sad reality, few hundred or thousand extremists are holding our country hostege and to be frank, holding their people hostage as well, since they are being hit by our artillery. I hope and prey that wisdom will enter the hearts of the leaders on both sides and that compassion instead of hatred will take over. But I know it's a naive thought and the reality is very different. I left this country many years ago because of this hopeless situation. I came back but nothing changed. I doubt that things will change in our lifetime. And this is such a sad and depressing thought.

My daughter is back

Day 1269 - because of the situation right now in Israel, where missile are being fired at more than 80% of our country's population my daughter decided to come back from her trip earlier than planned. It's not that she can do anything to make things better but at times like that you want to be here and not hear about in in CNN or the BBC. So I picked her up from the airport and brought her here to my house. I don't listen to the radio or watch TV and I don't update myself on the online Israeli news channels but she does, especially after coming home from a month trip, so for the first time since this current ordeal started I was informed about sirens going off in the south, about some rockets being fired towards our most populated metropolitan and I have to admit it's awful. In some areas sirens are going off multiple times a day. What kind of quality of life these people have right now. And more than that, what other country in the work will tolerate such aggression against its citizen with no response. So I live in the only big city not under attack at the moment, I can pretend nothing happens, but the truth is that the situation is unbearable. I don't envy our leaders for the tough decisions they have to make. But unt than we spend a wonderful day together and it was so great after such a long time I didn't see her. And who knows, if she'll be called to the army tomorrow it might be a while before we'll meet again. So a great day is something I alway cherish, we never know how our tomorrow will unfold.

I am thankful for a great day today with my youngest daughter. I am thankful she is back after such a long trip. I am thankful for the quite we have here; sadly in the situation right now in our country, it is not a given. I am thankful I can go to sleep now and I hope it will be for an uninterrupted night sleep with no midnight sirens to wake us up.

An evening on the beach

Day 1268 - we went to the beach after work, again. It's our relaxation time after a very busy week. The weather was nice and warm, the company very pleasant and it was just lovely. And so we stayed longer than usual, talking the evening away. At some point music started, oldies music, just the kind we like, and there was a cover group, not too bad. And so we stayed much later than usual until 10:30 pm when we finally left for home. It feels so good in all the chaos around us to find an island of calm and peace of mind.

I am thankful for a good week. I am thankful for relax time in our busy life. I am thankful for a lovely evening on the beach.

Expending our activities

Day 1267 - in the past few weeks we checked the option of opening a booth in one more shopping center and we decided about a certain one in our city. Today was the first time there. And it was very successful. So it seems like a new routine will be established where two days a week will be mall days. It's not easy, very long hours but its totally worth it. Especially since these kind of activity turn to improve with time as people will get to know me more. This is a short entry since its past midnight  already and I had a 13 hours work day today. But I am happy about the outcome.

I am thankful for this successful experiment. I am thankful I can go to sleep now.

For better days

Day 1266 - even when I don't listen to the news, other people do. And I keep getting phone calls to make sure all is well. The funny thing is that I didn't even know a missile reach our Area and hit A city only ten minutes drive away from where we live. I didn't know and I plan to keep doing that. I refuse to live in fear in my own county. But business is getting hurt. People are not in the mood for shopping when more than half the population in our country is under attack. So the fact that I ignore the news cannot change the overall situation, as much as I want I cannot creat my own reality when other people have to be part of it. But this is all very temporary and I hope it will resolve in a few days. Not even two years ago we were in a similar situation, but then the rockets attack was limited to the south, now it's going much further north. I find it so sad the we cannot live peacefully in our country, that the basic needs are denied of our people; to assemble for a party of one kind or another, to walk outside without looking around for a possible shelter, sleep in one's bed... I chose to come to my country, knowing full well the danger and the threats, and I am not regretting it for a minute , but it doesn't mean I have to think its ok.

I am sad tonight for all that is going on right now in my country. But I am so very thankful to be here. I join my country people in a prayer for better days ; for peace of mind, for peaceful nights, for peace at last.

Red alert

Day 1265 - high alert situation all over the country. The news are constantly talk about a military operation. But I refuse to play along. I won't open the radio or look on the Internet for updates. I will not contribute to this barrage of bad news. In my class tonight some of the people could hardly listen because they were so engaged on whatsapp updates. I don't like this atmosphere of fear and I will not take part in making it stick. I think the more we ignore it the faster it will dissolve. And if a rocket will fall on my head I'll die or get injured whether I was afraid before or not. Do at least until then I'll be able to live my life peacefully. A good class, a good day and I hope it will stay this way.
 
I am thankful for choices we have about our reaction to situations in life. I am thankful I learned enough in my life to realize that and to chose to stay calm and peaceful. I am thankful for my day.

Running chores

Day 1264 - running chores is part of life, the less pleasant one. But we still have to eat and wear clean clothes and water the garden and clean the house and buy groceries. In short, the few free hours are taken by these chores. So I try to do as much as I can in one evening instead of spreading them all over the week. This way I am done and free until next week. So tonight was such an evening. But I did it all very fast and by 9 pm I was done. Not too bad at all. Still, I wish I could have a magic wand that by one wave of my hand the food will be ready, the clothes washed and dry and folded, the house clean and the sink as well. I would still read my book and won't wave my wand for that. I own a mystic store, but sadly I don't do magic... But on a more serious note, I know I am lucky I can do all that; and I know that the future holds days I won't be able to do that anymore, and will miss these days of unappreciated work, chores and all. So I am healthy and strong and once a week I devote few hours to take care of the physical needs in my life. No biggy!!
 
I am thankful for my life as they are, chores and all. I am thankful for my health, my strength, for my ability to lead my life as I please; I know I shouldn't take it for granted.

What to do about wrong decisions

Day 1263 - It is easy to say thanks when all is going well and according to plans. It is not as easy when our train is derailed or even when we just have little bumps on the road. Working my first steps in numerology I already encountered some of those wrong decisions, as part of our training. What do you do when you realize that for years you took the wrong fork in the road and you are going to miss your calling according to "your numbers"? do you fight to make it right, even when told that the planet might take unpleasant steps in order to bring you back to where you were suppose to be at this stage of the game, or do you listen and try to "make it right". An interesting dilemma indeed. We are taught from an early age to never give up even when the going gets hard and that "if we will insist and won't give up we can make it happen". But numerology says that every one came here to do something and if you are choosing the wrong things or using the wrong "tools" to get there it just won't happen. I am too new at all this and don't yet have enough experience to form an opinion of my own in this specific subject, but it is a very interesting issue and I hope that in a month or two I will have a clearer idea of how to incorporate this ancient knowledge into my set of values and my believes; and I am aware of the fact that I might have to change some of what I thought before. In the mean time I practice it as much as I can with the very few tools I learned so far and it's so very interesting. I also learn to take a step back and look at the person in front of me and think about his needs and his conflicts without looking at it from my point of view, because I use different filters thus see things differently. In short even at this stage I think I gained some very important tools for life, no matter how well I will be able to work as a numerologist. Talking to my kids, to friends I can feel the difference and I hope I will be able to bring some value to them as well.

I am thankful for this wonderful decision to take this course. I am thankful for rewards beyond my wildest dreams. I am thankful for a wonderful talk I had tonight with my son. I am thankful for my day.

If we only open our eyes

Day 1262 - we were sitting tonight in our little patio when I saw on the lawn of the building a big animal. It was dark outside and the animal looked almost white in the artificial lights of the street lamps and I thought it was a dog. . I didn't pay much attention and kept to my own business but when I saw two more such animals and one that looked way too big to be a dog. So I got up and walked toward the gate and to my surprise on the other side, not more than 20 feet away were 4 wild boars! one huge two of medium size and a little one. We hear them almost every night from the wild preserve just outside of our window, we saw the destruction they left behind when we just moved here, but I sure did not expect to see them so close at 8:30 pm when people are still walking in the street. It was an unbelievable sight. I live in a city, a big city of more than 250,000 people, and in the early evening, a family of bores are walking the streets. And I tried to move away from here to live in more of a natural settings, to be closer to mother earth. Sometime we just have to clear our mind of all the preconceptions and actually look around. We might be surprise of what we see if we only live mindfully.
 
I am thankful for this opportunity I got to live in the middle of a bustling city and still be not even 20 feet away from nature and its marvels. I am thankful for the reminder, once again to live consciously, to be fully present in my life. I am thankful for a wonderful weekend.  

Friday night on the beach

Day 1261 - Friday is a short day so after wok we drove to the beach. We stayed there for almost 5 hours, waching the people go by, waching the day coming to its end and the evening coming in its wake and covering everything in a thick dark blanket. Sitting on the beach enjoying the cool evening breeze, enjoying each other's company. Friday night, no hurry since tomorrow is Shabbath thus our day off. The best things in life come free and we don't have to travel far to look for it or pay anything for it. All we have to do is be in the moment and take it all in.

For the million time I kneel on my knees and thank The Lord for all the blessings in my life. I am thankful for living in this city by the sea. I am thankful for a wonderful evening that washed away everything and left me so relaxed and content.

Catching up

Day 1260 - working every day in the store with no running around brings some calm and focus. Only now I realize how stressed I was and overworked; and the worst is that both places were compromised and were not done well and I suffered from gilt for not doing my work to the standards I was hoping. But now this rat race is over and day by day I negotiate my way through piles of delayed work. 
I am thankful I am at a stage were I can start the catching up. I am thankful every day for the planet that's welcoming my decision. I am thankful for every day for every new thing. 

A nation in mournin

Day 1259 - three teenager, ages 16 and 19 were kidnapped and murdered almost three weeks ago. Their only crime was that they were Jewish. There are monsters in this world that will stop at nothing to prove a point. People who use the name of God to perform the worst atrocities. I have no kind we'd to say, no understanding. I stand with my grief stricken country mournin the loss of young life. sad, so very sad.

Choices

Day 1258 - we learned today in my numerology class about choices we make and what happens if we make the wrong choices. Every week I am amazed at how accurate it is and how much can you tell from someone's birth date. We see what is the environment he should live in, the profession he should take, the spouse, names for his kids... It's fascinating and it leaves us stunned sometimes. So when we make the wrong choices or take the wrong path, we are going to miss on some things we were destined to have or do. And more than that, our soul will force us to get back on track, and it can be unpleasant sometimes. We look at the numbers and a person's life is unfolding in front of us. I feel so lucky to be in this class and be exposed to all this knowledge.
 
I am thankful for this opportunity to study something so powerfully and important. I am thankful for all the knowledge I get. I am thankful for the new perspective I get in the way I look at people I know and those I analyze; non judgmental and objective.