A warm welcome

Day 712 - My partner has a son who lives in another country so the only way for him to communicate is by Skype. Today he had a Skype session with his son, the first one since he moved here and he asked me to join him. He wanted to introduce me, to make me part of his family. It was a very nice call and very easy going and we all talked for about two hours. This little gesture made me very happy - he included me in his very close and sacred circle of family. I did the same for him and introduced him to my daughter but for some reason it is still very new to me when my partner is so nice and kind to me. I have to learn to expect this kind of behavior and actually make it the golden standard. I feel so lucky to have this man in my life who loves me so much and let me feel it any way he can.

I am thankful for a very long and productive evening of taking care of business. I am thankful for the warm and very kind welcome by which I was accepted into his family. I am so very thankful for this love that befall on me and makes every moment of my day so special.

Hiking

Day 711 - Today we had our first hike with my hiking group, and it was wonderful. The day started as a very sunny day and ended with serious rain which made our hike very challenging. Everyone had a very light load, ad befit a day hike, but we are training for the trek in less than a month so we have to start carrying big backpacks. We found out that we have some more training to do and by the end of the day, especially with the rain we were very tired and our bodies aching but few hours later we are fine, so we know we can do it, but we also know it will take a serious toll on us and we are ready for that. It was so wonderful to have the man who is such a big part of my life as part of this activity that is so dear to me. I never had a partner for that since I moved here and it made me all so happy to have that. At some point I realized that this is one of the things I am looking for in a partner - the love for the outdoors and specifically for hiking. And I finally did. I found a man who share so many values with me and likes the same recreational activities, I have found my match, and I am so happy for that. Happiness I have not experienced in many years. What else can I ask for?
  
I am thankful for a day out in nature, taking in the beauty and the friendship. I am thankful for a random meeting in the mountain of a good friend I have not seen in more than a year and the kind and encouraging words he sent me after that. I am thankful for a whole day I got to spend with my partner, for his love and friendship, for this ability to combine both of my loves. I am thankful for the challenge and the recovery. I am thankful for all the blessings in my life.

A day with my loved ones

Day 710 - it was a long day. that started 20 hours ago. We hiked on the boardwalk of the city where my daughter lives, a long hike - an hour in each direction and we just came back from a dance party for the new year. (Yes the new year is few days away but here it is a regular work day so most of the parties are taking place this weekend). Dancing with the man I love was so wonderful, making it a unique experience, a great party. It's late now and we are very tired and tomorrow morning we are going on a serious hike with my group, so this is a short entry. It was a great day; I enjoyed the the walk on the boardwalk, and even more so the fact that at the end of it we met our best friends here and we most important of all we met my daughter for a few hours. I had to be in the city and I never miss a chance to see her, even if only for a few hours since she worked in the morning.

IU am thankful for a wonderful day, full of laughter and sunshine and love. I am thankful for the chance to see all the most important people for me here, in one place. I am thankful for a fun night, for great plans for tomorrow and most of all I am thankful I can go to sleep now; I have to admit - I am tired.

Tarot reading

Day 709 - As part of the tarot course one has to find his "signification" card, the card that represents who he is today and the lessons he has to internalize as part of his spiritual development, as part of his journey. There is a very structured process by which this card is identified and it can take a long time. The process starts when one buys his tarot cards and take care of them in a special way for 21 days and only then he can do this. You open once a day until a card from the majors is the card of the day. Yesterday was the first day I could open and I got a minor card. Tonight after coming back from the painting class we did another session and I got my card. It was a very good card, one of the best in the tarot deck and the interesting thing is that I don't feel I deserve it. I feel I have so much to learn and to do, I don't see myself in that point of the journey, I wish one day I will. And it makes me realize few things - I have to learn to accept complements; I have to learn to trust my ability and my strength and I have to understand what this card is trying to teach me, what are the actions I have to take in order to make my life the magic that the card promises if I'll take the right steps. I have to internalize all that and work at it diligently. My partner was very happy with the card I got, I on the other hand was not. I have to find out why.
   
I am thankful for a wonderful day; a day with not even one episode of heart burn - I forgot how wonderful that feels, I am thankful for a great painting class after two weeks I didn't go due to heavy rains. I am thankful  for a very interesting Tarot session, for the wonderful reaction of my partner. I am thankful for the lessons I have to learn, for the acknowledgement of the journey I took so far and the ones ahead of me.  

GI procedure? - check!

Day 708 - Today was my medical procedure and I have to admit that it was nothing at all. I can't believe that I delayed these procedures for years and suffered for no reason. They took some biopsies of course so I will not have final answer for a few weeks now but it looks like they found the reason for my constant heart burns, the big damage already done to my body because of years I neglected it and now I will have some serious medications to try and fix that. But I am very happy; for doing it, for finding the culprit and for having all this behind me. Now I am finally on my way to recovery. A very strict diet, and medications should do the job and in the process I might loose a few pounds and drop my cholesterol levels - all good things. I also want to acknowledge the role my partner took today. He came with me to the hospital, stayed with me all the way to the OR and was there as soon as I got out. He was so nice and gentle and it made me so happy; it's something I didn't expect and I really appreciate so very much. And he did it and didn't expect anything in return; didn't think this behavior is something special, just as it should. I sure don't take something like that for granted, I learned that a long time ago.

I am thankful this day I dreaded so much is behind me. I am thankful it was really nothing to even mention. I am thankful to my daughter and my parents for their concern and well wishing. I am thankful to this wonderful man in my life who was so nice and kind to me; made the day so special. 

Moving in together

Day 707 - My partner moved here on a more permanent basis. He brought his very few worldly possessions to my house and as of today I am starting a new chapter in my life, we both are. It is both scary and exciting but I would not do that had I not think it is the right man and the right thing to do. If he lived in the same city as I do we might have waited a little longer but since he lives 2 hours away it doesn't make any sense and so we made this decision to move in together after such a short time. He believes in keeping as little as possible possessions and looking at what he brought it made me realize how much I accumulated in the past two years. I have a lot to say about it but not today. his evening I want to concentrate on this very special event that just happened. I didn't believe it will happen again and definitely not so soon but I was fortunate enough that the universe smiled at me again and I was not about to let this magic moment pass just because it's so soon, only two and a half years after I left my previous life, my marriage and moved back here.
  
I am thankful for such an emotional day, for a huge decision that I am so happy i was strong enough to make. I am thankful for the generosity of the universe. I am thankful for this love that shines on my life again, for this special man that has entered them and makes every day so special.   

An evening hike

Day 706 - I am planning to go on the trail in a month time so I decided it is time to start training more seriously. So when I came back from work I changed my cloths, put on my hiking shoes and we went out for a long walk.We live in a city perched on a mountain so it gives us a real challenges and real opportunity for training. we went down half the mountain and then climbed it up again. I am very happy to report that I am still in very good condition and I did it well, that my many hiking trips prepared me for this adventure. From hiking down very steep road to hiking up hill on hundreds of stairs. It is a beautiful city and the evening air was fresh and a little cold, it was so nice to be outside in an evening like that and take it all in. in the weekend we will have to hike with a heavy backpack just to get used to it as well, but overall I think I will be OK and it makes me very happy. 
  
I am thankful for another day in this wonderful city of mine, in this amazing country.  I am thankful for having a hiking partner; I have to admit I didn't do it much and I really should; so, I am thankful for his encouragement to start hiking and training. I am thankful for a very plesant hike today.   

A long overdue procedure

Day 705 - After few years of nagging heartburn and doctors warning that I have to check what causing it I decided to do the procedure; the fact that my daughter did it was the last straw in my resistance campaign and today I finally scheduled it for this coming Wednesday. I have to admit I am not looking forward to it and I wish I could still avoid it, but I know it is something long overdue and I will not dodge it any longer. So right now I am on a very strict diet for the next three days of what I am allowed to it and what not and I will probably complain about it for the coming few days. Still I hope that years of neglect did not cause an irreversible damage and that they will finally identify the problem and fix it. In the name of wishing not to be a paranoid I neglected my body big times and I hope there will be no consequences to that. I will try to be better from now on.
  
I am thankful to my partner who almost forced me to go and schedule the procedure after another night of suffering. I am thankful to my daughter for showing me the way to handle such things. I am thankful I could schedule it right away so I will be done with it before I'll have time to regret it. I am thankful for the miracles of modern medicine for what they can offer us today and I hope it will offer me a cure. 

In love for real

Day 704 - I read few old blogs of mine, I kept talking about love all the time. I realized I used the word too freely, knowing all too well that it's not really love but using the word never the less. Only now when I found the man I am actually thinking very seriously of sharing the second half of my life with I am starting to grasp the depth of feelings and emotions involved in such a vast thing as love. It makes me almost embarrassed to read these earlier entries, to see what I considered as love. But I also feel so very fortunate to have found a man I am developing such strong feelings for; to have someone that makes me so much more me. It makes me happy to know that in the end of a long day we are going to spend our next day together as well. That I want to talk to him all day long; that I am so thankful our paths have crossed...

I am thankful for having love again in my life. I am thankful I have found the man that the two of us together are a synergism so powerful and whole. I am thankful for every trial, for every false start, for all the lessons I had to learn in order to arrive so ready to the finish line.

Sabbath dinner

Day 703 - my daughter is here for a visit and it is Friday night so we decided to have a nice Sabbath dinner. She had a friend who joined us also so it was like a real family - two parents and two daughters. We had a nice dinner and we just took our time to enjoy the food and the company; lots of laughter and funny stories and more serious talks and we all had just good old time. Since we left home we didn't have this kind of a family time and it was so wonderful I feel so warm and fuzzy at the end of such an evening. My daughter drove her friend back home and called me from the road to tell me she felt the same way. I am so happy just thinking I will be able to give her a gain this warmth of a home she lost, and for me to have the same thing. I talked with my partner afterwords and we both feel like we are together for so long, it really doesn't feel like we are on a trial period, but like we are just there with and for each other; that we are blessing every day the universe for bringing us together, for arranging for our paths to cross. It is a little over a month since we are together and there is no doubt in our minds that we are both here for the long run; until our last day here on this earth. We are talking about doing holidays with our kids and later grandchildren... today showed us how much fun is ahead of us, how wonderful life can be for all of us.
   
I am thankful for an amazing evening; for an experience I didn't enjoy for such a long time. I am thankful to my daughter for being the wonderful young woman she is so warm and accepting, making it so easy for my partner. I am thankful to the universe for bringing this wonderful man into my path. I am thankful for this wonderful part of my journey, hoping never to take him for granted, always keep this fresh look.     

Facebook challenge

Day 702 - For the past few hours I was working on Facebook trying to set a new page for my partner. It took me so many trials to get anything done and it's kind of frustrating since I am sure it can be done so much faster, but I had no one to ask so I had to reinvent the wheel. But at the end of a long evening it looks OK and I am so happy I managed to do that. Next time it will be so much faster (I hope). it is very late, again and my daughter is coming here in a few hours so I want to get few hours of sleep before I have to pick her up.

I am thankful I managed to do what I set up to do, even if it took me such a long time. I am thankful my daughter is coming to visit us today, it means so much to me. I am thankful I can go to sleep now.

A tent in the middle of my living room

Day 701 - We are starting to get ready for the trail. We bought equipment few days ago and delayed the decision about few more items until we'll test what we have. So today when I came home after work we pitched my tent in the middle of the living room and inside we opened the rubber foam mattress and the sleeping bags. We put our backpacks inside and we got in as well to see how comfortable it is and how crowded. We also tried on the thermal cloths and gloves and hats... it is winter after all and a winter in the desert where there's no one to help is not something to take lightly. Well, we came to some serious conclusions - we have to find a better tent; the one I have is too bulky and too heavy. I also have to find a hiking stick. it's too expensive to buy and I only need it here so no reason to buy. but overall we are well equipped  have the right gear and now it is time to start training for the hike. As I write this the winds are howling outside - it's gonna be interesting hike on Friday!

I am thankful for the wonderful evening we spent testing and trying our gear we had so much fun. I am thankful for this amazing man who knows how difficult and testing is the trail and yet is ready to take it again for me. I am thankful for such a special evening. I am thankful we are a big step forward in out preparations for the trail
 

Looking for an apartment

Day 700 - We went to look for an apartment today. It sounds so simple and a matter of fact until I stopped for one moment to think about the meaning of that act. We want to live together; the way we look at it right now we want to share our lives for the rest of our lives. Otherwise we won't take this step. It doesn't cease to amaze me how from day two it was so clear to me (to him even before we met) that we are meant to be together; that we will fall for each other so hard. You hear these stories about love at first sight but by the time one gets to my age, you don't really believe in fairy tales anymore. and then one day, almost out of nowhere, it falls on my head. The day after we met I thought I met my soul mate. our second meeting brought me to say that I think he is the one. and every passing day, every phone call, every day we spend together makes me love him more; make our relationship stronger and more meaningful. I don't know how to contain all the feelings I am swamped with, it's overflowing.
  
I am thankful for every moment of happiness; I have my life experience to know I should never take it for granted. I am thankful for every difficult moment along the way - it brought me to the place where I am today and it brought us together. I am thankful for our decision to move in together; it is such a special moment and I cherish it so much.    

Getting the right gear

Day 699 - I took the first step towards my up coming trip. I bought a new backpack, the right kind for a long hiking trip where I have to carry my house on my back for days on end. It has to be the right kind; sturdy yet light. It has to distribute the weight properly or else I won't be able to do it for the long run. So I bought a backpack. Nice and very light but one that can easily store about 25 lb of the bare necessities. My partner had to buy new hiking shoes. And now, armed with all the goodies we just acquired we have to start training. this coming weekend, rain or shine (and from the weather forecast it looks like rain) we are going to for our first serious hike. More to come...
  
I am thankful for this air of excitement as we getting ready for the upcoming adventure. I am so very thankful I found a partner that find excitement in the same strange place as I do. I am thankful to the point of bursting for this upcoming trip

Billboard announcement

Day 698 - I posted today on Facebook pictures from our hike yesterday. After few "likes" it donned on me that I posted pictured of me and my new partner and its very clear how we feel about each other; I realized it was an announcement to the world that I think I found "the one". Maybe they don't look at it this way, but this is how I felt when I started getting comments about how cute we look together. Was it my subconscious that pushed me to do that? does it really mean anything? It is not the first guy I am dating but it is the first time that I am making it "official". All my friends saw that, probably even my ex, if he bothers to stock me, which he probably doesn't. But I was very happy with it; it felt good and right and I don't mind announcing it since I am very serious about it and with every passing day I feel it more. I didn't believe I will ever feel this way again; I forgot when was the last time I did, but it sure something I welcome into my life with open arms and open heart. These blessed rains that quench my thirst, that of the nomad on the desert roads. It feels like the universe is looking for me, taking care of me and it sure is a wonderful feeling.
  
I am thankful for this happiness long forgotten; I am thankful it fills my days, my life. I am thankful for every magical moment. I am thankful for every tender and loving moment; I feel honored to be the recipient of so much; I hope I can do enough to deserve it.