Velentine's Day

Day 27 - Valentine's Day. They always say that this is a specially difficult day for people who have no date tonight or just broke up with a loved one, or don't have a significant other in their life. And here I am - all of the above. So I was asking myself today of why this is something to be thankful. Why being alone and with no one in my life is a good thing? Well, first of all, as you know, to be happy or sad is a choice and I choose to be happy, to look at the good and bright and uplifting. So, right there I am not sad. It is also my choice to be outside of my marriage, so how can I be upset or sad. But the most important reason is that it is time for very special relations in my life and after so many years of being last in line for my attention, I am now in the center. I am learning, everyday a little more to love myself. It sounds bad; we are taught from early on that to love thyself is a bad thing. But it really isn't. How can I appreciate or be able to accept someone else's love to me if I can't love myself. It will make me doubt it, at least subconsciously. he loves me? - something must be wrong with him/he wants something/soon he'll find out who I really am and will leave... you name it. So if I ever want to be able to change the relations in my life, I simple self-love. The same kind as the way I love my kids, full acceptance, protective and non-conditional. And I know that this is a very important step. I will never be able to find love again until I'll accept and love myself as I am here and now. So this Valentines' Day I got the gift of time and awareness to make some changes in the way I treat and look at myself.

I am very thankful for being single tonight, so I have time for the most important person in my life - me.