Being All Alone Here

Day 459 – I had a very relaxing day today. I went with a friend to visit a mutual friend in a small settlement in the countryside and it was much fun. I miss living outside of the city with flowers and trees all around. I really am a country girl and not a city mouse. So we had a wonderful time. In the evening after I got back home I talked to my kids on the phone. Right now all the three of them are on the other side of the ocean and it makes me very sad. I miss them so much. Everyone dear to me is over there and I am here all alone; what a mess. I love it here and I want to stay here but everyone is there and I can’t even go and visit right now. I am sitting here and my heart is aching so much. I terribly miss them. This is the real price of moving abroad; this is the real price we all paid for this divorce. A torn family that is never together in one place anymore. My Children that I rarely get to see, and a granddaughter I barely know. And I have no one to cry on his shoulder right now, no one I can tell how sad I am. 
And now I have to find a reason to be thankful for all that.

  

I am thankful they are all happy and well, even if far away from me. I am thankful for having a good day today, for friends who made it easier for me even if they were not aware of that. I am thankful my daughter is coming back in two weeks. And mostly I am thankful that it’s rare I am so sad, that usually I can find things to make me happy even if the circumstances are the same.