Day 63 - Life can be very trying sometimes but this is how we grow up, this is how we get stronger. When I have to face difficult moments it tests my strength and my limits and it makes me push harder than I ever thought possible in order to try and change a situation, or learn to accept what I cannot change. it requires self examination and truly listening to my heart, to my ancient wisdom. and it also shows me, time and again that I am so much stronger than I ever thought possible and that the things I feared most cannot break me. This is why we get stronger - we learn to face our fears and we learn we can deal with them. Some people get addicted to rubbing against their fears. I don't think I am one of them, but I learn everyday how much stronger than I thought I am and how much I can open my heart to pain and not buckle. And I know that this ability to stay calm and open is what will make me whole again. I will never run and hide again, even if I'll have to fight every instinct in my body, because I know all too well what is the price for living in fear and I will never be in that position again. I don't live behind mask anymore and I don't hide my life whether they are in a high point or a low point I am an open book.
I am writing about my personal pain and few of my friends called and talked about it. I feel so thankful for that. I am thankful for friendships in times of need, I am thankful for the opportunity to grow and get better. A better person, woman and mother. I said it in so many words already, even at times of pain I am so thankful for my life, for the ups and for the downs. And I am sure that everything is there for a reason, a lesson I have to learn, a sharp edge I have to round, a little more grace and less pride. I am thankful for all life's lessons.
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