Sleep deprivation

Day 531 – I finally realized I cannot go on like that. Sleep deprivation is not something to be proud of and definitely can’t be a way of life; just as the name suggests I am depriving my body of something it really needs. It can’t be a good thing in the long run and it’s not an act of self-care and self-love. And if I’ll be completely honest, I am so tired lately that I fell asleep at my desk several times already. But somehow, when the clock start crawling towards the wee hours of the night, I get a second wind and neglect to notice it. Yesterday it was suddenly 2 am – not cool by any standards. So part of getting back to normal life after the past two months craze is also to get back into a healthier sleep schedule. Just as I did when I first moved here, I am going to sleep in a normal hour and hopefully after a few weeks like that I will also be able to wake up in an earlier time and see the sunrise again, something I used to do every day and by now I forgot when was the last time. It’s not really early right now, but I had a class today so I only came home at 9:45pm and I am already doing the last thing before going to bed – writing my blog, all else is already behind me. I read some of my latest entries and even there I can see how tired I am and not in focus. I want to get back to the way things worked last year; I think it will do me a world of good. And if I will be able to stick to that I have few more ideas, but I’ll take it slowly, one step at a time, so I will not be overwhelmed and give up.

 

I am thankful for an early sleep time; I sure need it so much. I am thankful for a very interesting class today; we are getting to the end of our course and we are going over everything for the finals and it’s so strange and exciting, all at once. I am thankful for a long talk with my son and with my daughter and with few of my friends. I am going to bed now and I am so thankful for that.