Day 302 - I came home today around 6 pm, took my dog for a walk and an hour later I was back home and didn’t leave anymore. It’s kind of sad sometimes to lock my home at 7 pm and know that I will not go out anymore, nor anyone will come to visit. I’m getting lonely sometimes. But then I remind myself that this is how life works. I will have a huge surge upwards and then the wave will subside and it will feel like withdrawal, and a lull. So I am on the low tide now. The great energy from few days ago is washed and I feel a little drained, and a little sad for being so alone, for having no one in my life right now. But I know these feelings are temporary and I know that in a few days all will be well again. So I allow myself to just be with that heavy feeling and with the sadness and not try to do anything to alleviate the pain, just breath into it and listen. There are so many lessons I can get from that simple act of acceptance.
I am thankful for the opportunity to be on a little less happy note today. I am thankful for the gifts I get for allowing myself to be sad and to slow down. I am thankful I already know the pattern and I am ready and willing to accept it. I am thankful for being sad and lonely, for the gifts it brings me.
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