Day 643 - I went on a date today after work. the first date since the breakup and I realized few things. First and most importantly - I can date and it feels fine. But secondly - I am really not interested. He was a nice guy and in other times I might be more interested but not right now, it's too close and I am really not interested in starting a new relationship at the moment apparently. I need time to be alone again, I need time for myself, without having to think about someone else. My heart and my mind are not open for the BS of someone new who tries to impress me. I agreed to go on this date, but it is not the right timing and maybe he is just not the right guy and didn't do it for me. What ever is the reason I was waiting for this date to be over, so I can back home and go to bed. The interesting thing is that the guy had so many of the traits I have on my "must have" list and yet, he didn't make the cut. I guess it's a good thing; I have to understand the magic in a meeting of a man and a woman when sparks fly, or even when delicate strings are being pulled from one heart to the other. It didn't happened tonight and I don't have the feeling of missing something. I guess it is just another frog, one that I didn't even bother to kiss; it was clear even before. I am happy though that I tried, that I can go on dates and be comfortable.
I am thankful for a nice evening with a very nice guy, even if it is not going to work. I am thankful for learning one more lesson about dating; I will get better with practice, a very important skill. I am thankful that I got back home early enough and in 10 minutes, way before midnight, I'll be asleep. I am thankful for lessons learned every day. I am thankful for a wonderful day, for evening on the beach; for another day in my private heaven.
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