My New Year Resolutions

Day 617 - It was a long day. In regular times, since this is the day of atonement, I will be sitting and pondering about my life, about the year that just passed and the new one in our gates. But this year is not regular. I have a project I delayed as much as I could and its due date is tomorrow. So I woke up this morning at 7:30, really not something you want to do on a day off especially when you are fasting, but I had work to do. For the next 8 hours I was just working and researching and typing away my plans and ideas for this special trip to Cambodia, with only few short breaks just to move around a little and get off the computer. At 15:30 I put the last period on the electronic document and was finally able to call it a day; finally be able to pay attention to my beloved daughter who was fasting here with me and had to deal with a totally absentee mother. But I am done. I met my deadline and as usual I am asking myself, why do I do this, why do I delay everything until the very last moment and than have to work crazy hours to meet my goal, why don't I just do it slowly as originally planned . I have to start working on this issue. It is something I know and fight my whole life and I think it is time to take it more seriously and start dealing with it. It just doesn't make sense I am not a kid anymore and I should be able to do that. Maybe this should be my new year resolution - 

• work on my tendency to procrastinate and actually come on top of it. 

What else do I want to achieve this coming year?

• Keep painting and not be afraid to break the rules, and my own boundaries
• Get back to writing my book and now with broader view and less anger
• still, like every year, read at least one book a month
• Try to put my finances in order, go into investments maybe or find a way to earn more money 
• Take at least one trip abroad, a brave one to an unfamiliar land
•  Relationship, not sure yet if I want to put it as a goal so not a resolution, just something to think about
• Start cooking again and start entertaining again
• Volunteering of some sort
• Be a good person to my loved ones and to everyone else - stay in touch with the important people in my life

I have a big list. I hope to be able by the end of this year to look back and say - I achieved it all. May I and everyone in my life have a healthy and fulfilling year.

   

I am thankful to have finished my project. I am thankful to my daughter for being so supportive and enabling me to do this. I am thankful for serious talks I had today with my mother in law, with my MF, and with my daughter; it is new year and I love these kind of discussions. I am thankful for people who love me enough to be able to tell me things they know I won't like to hear; I really appreciate that. I am thankful for a very meaningful holy-day; for a meaningful year; for the new year in our gates; for my life with all the turns and pitfalls, just as they are.